Char the Butcher

Have I told you how my boything and I came out as sadomasochistic to our families?

The Citadel has a contingent in Pride every summer.  During Pride ’09, my catamite and I were invited to ride on the Citadel float, which was basically a pickup that had been decorated in blue, black, white & red and had a St. Andrews cross in the back.  So we got into the back and flogged each other down Market Street.  On national live tv.

Neither of our families really watch tv, but my dad and boything’s mom were in the crowd (at our invitation) and got a pretty good view.  So later that night, we were having dinner with my (born) family, and I think it was my uncle who started asking about the Citadel and what it was.  And I gave the answer I’d been using around family for a while: oh, it’s an alt sexuality community center, they host events and classes and a 12-step meeting, really nice people, etc.  This time, though, my uncle requested elaboration: exactly what kind of alternative sexuality was it focused on?

I glanced at my boything, who seemed to be wearing a rather bemused expression, then around at everyone else present.  My mother, father, auntie, uncle, and cousin were all doing a terrible job at disguising their curiosity.

“Well,” I said, “it’s a bdsm dungeon, where people go to practice consensual kink and sadomasochism.”

“Oh,” my uncle said.

And then we all had dinner and that was that.  Or at least that was that for that evening.

dopernose:

Being a blogger is kind of like being a parent and your ‘original’ posts are like your kids. As a parent it’s painful seeing one of your kids fall into the hands of humorless social justice bloggers and their shitty GIFs. It makes me want to completely disassociate myself from the post. It’s like when a mama cat shuns one of her kittens or eats it when ‘outside forces’ tamper with it. I’m not sure, I don’t really know too much about cats beyond the basics. 

Meow.

Anonymous asked: do you think 'transition privilege' is a thing? like, trans*people being able to more openly identify (although not safely a lot of the time) in the west than in other places? for example a trans*person is from a country that condemns LGBTQ --period-- having to present cis because they would be excommunicated, imprisoned, or killed if they tried socially transitioning? or does this just fit into western privilege in general?

Hi, tumblr.  I was cleaning out my inbox and I found this from a while ago.  My first instinct was to ignore it, which honestly may have been the best course of action.  This will probably get gross.

I have a few reactions to this.  The first is- just who the fuck do you think I am?  I’m not some widely-read academic or even someone with heaps of personal global experience to draw upon.  The simple answer is I do not know.  I really try to speak only from my own experiences, and my experience outside the SF bay area is pretty limited.

Second, I’m not sure what you meant by “western privilege,” but in this context it really sounds like you’re trying to say that it’s a privilege to live in the “west.”  Wow.  That’s incredibly fucked up.  URGH.

Also there’s this sense I get from your ask that you feel that the eurocentric understanding of gender and the method of transition generally proscribed in this culture are things that everyone else ought to strive for.  If this is the case, it tramples directly upon the gender norms and practices of every other culture in the world, where concepts like “trans*” and “cis” may not be as meaningful or appropriate as they are in this specific eurocentric society.  So reading your message I get a real sense of a feeling of superiority regarding our beliefs on gender and a sense that we ought to export and impose those beliefs on everyone else.  This is something I do not support.

Like I said at the beginning, though, I’m just a white queer kid from SF with ZERO experience on this topic, mouthing off on the internet.  Why would you even ask me this question?  (Is it because I’m a white queer kid from SF?)  If anyone wants to contribute their opinion on this, I’d be delighted.

so unimportant

I’ve added a twitter box to my page.  It shows my most recent tweet.  I have my so-not-smart phone and no computer with me most of the time, so twitter kind of makes sense for me.

Update

johnnyistruant:

I spent today running around various agencies in the city. No one really seemed to know what to do with me. One rehab was reluctantly willing to take me into their 45 day stabilization program, but they warned me that they could not provide the kind of monitoring I needed. Pretty much everyone said one thing: check myself into the hospital.

Pretty much everyone pointed out that it’s better to do this voluntarily than it is to do it involuntarily.

So, I’ll be in the hospital for a few days.

I love you.

Anonymous asked: Hey there. A while ago, when all the "die cis scum" stuff came up, I was one of the apologists. I think I said that the tattoo should have read die /cissexist/ scum instead of cis because being cis isn't a choice. Now I see that cis =/= cis scum, and being cis scum is, in fact, a choice. Thank you for opening my eyes to that, and you have my full support. Stay strong.

I normally do not post supportive anonymous messages (because I am somewhat neurotic and fear that people will think that I made them up and am sending them to myself) (I am a fucking addict and that is how my brain works), but this was very sweet.  Thank you for the kind words.