cannot handle being told this is not a thing right...

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

“cannot handle being told this is not a thing right now
The community dungeon I love and that I depend on to be able to carry out my sex life without the cops being called (because seriously Char and I can’t play in our fucking apartment, are you kidding me, the thwacking and screaming would DEFINITELY get some attention) is currently being pushed out of its old space because of gentrification, and just found out they can’t move into the new space which it took them MONTHS to find (even though they have excellent references and are totally legal) because of discrimination. Yep, some asshole neighbor who didn’t want a dungeon moving in on the nice end of 6th Street complained. So we’re out on our asses again. Totally displaced.
I don’t think I can explain to you what this feels like.
All the negative media, all the legal, medical, and psychiatric discrimination, all the social stigma— not real, doesn’t matter.
Can’t say anything more eloquent. Not prepared to bandy about social justice buzzwords. I am just tired as hell of vanilla people and semi-kinky spank-n-giggle queers acting like kink is just totally acceptable and we are whining about nothing.
It is NOT just a few people who think we are weird and a handful of radscummy anti porn fauxminists that we are up against. I wish that was all. But it’s not. It’s laws, it’s the police, it’s the media, it’s medical and psychiatric professionals, and it’s the DSM. And more.
If this gets fifty plus nasty reblogs from jerks who want to preserve the purity of the term oppression I will be fucking upset but you know what, that can’t change anything. I’m talking about some lived experience here, the incredibly sad experience of seeing a whole community and culture getting pushed around without any place to call our own here in San Francisco, of all places. And I’m wondering— where will we gather? Where will we be able to do what we have to do?
Because I’m really afraid that if we lose the Citadel, what’s gonna happen is that the rich white male doms are just gonna be like whatever, I can have all the rowdy play parties I want at my mansion in Marin for my little inner circle of friends, and the folks who are living paycheck to paycheck in apartment buildings, like Char and myself, are gonna be forced to tone down our sex life indefinitely. The thought makes me want to scream.
If you think I should be able to give that up, if you think being deprived of sex that actually satisfies me and makes me happy is no big deal, I don’t know what I can say to you.”

CATAMITE: wrote a fucking post on kinkphobia and then deleted it